Stop trying to fix this. Stop trying to fix me. Please.
I’m in pain. I’m hurting. I’ve messed things up.
I’ve heard all your “answers” before – your well-meaning advice. And I agree with you. I acknowledge the truth. Yes, I know I’ll get through this. Yes, I know it is making me stronger, and Yes, I know God is with me.
But it still hurts.
You see, smart answers and good theology and wise practical instruction are rarely helpful in the midst of suffering. What I need – what I really need – is for you just to listen. To be with me in my pain without trying to fix it, or go around it, or smooth it over. To have the courage to sit with me when there is nothing to say, and say nothing.
For sure, a healthy perspective on pain and a good theology of suffering can certainly be helpful down the track. I know there are things I need to change. To do better. But right now what I really need is just some empathy and compassion.
Even if you can see clearly the path going forward, or how I got myself into this mess in the first place, trying to solve my problems is really not helping.